Warning: Declaration of subscribe2_widget::addPluginSubMenu() should be compatible with mijnpress_plugin_framework::addPluginSubMenu($title, $function, $file, $capability = 10, $where = 'plugins.ph...') in /home/themal8/public_html/wp-content/plugins/subscribe2-widget/subscribe2-widget.php on line 18

Warning: Declaration of subscribe2_widget::addPluginContent($links, $file) should be compatible with mijnpress_plugin_framework::addPluginContent($filename, $links, $file, $config_url = NULL) in /home/themal8/public_html/wp-content/plugins/subscribe2-widget/subscribe2-widget.php on line 18
#KitchenFail | The Maladroit Wife
Warning: Illegal string offset 'let_facebook_pick_pic' in /home/themal8/public_html/wp-content/plugins/sharepress/sharepress.php on line 704

Warning: Illegal string offset 'let_facebook_pick_pic' in /home/themal8/public_html/wp-content/plugins/sharepress/sharepress.php on line 707

#KitchenFail

4 Nov

I think I’d say my main wifely skill is cooking, so I’m sure you can imagine the existential crisis that followed my two (in one week!) recent kitchen failures.

First up: chocolate covered banana bites.  Bluth bananas, if you will.

The plan was to cover a baking sheet in crushed peanuts,

and then melt some chocolate,

and dunk slices of banana in there.  Then they go on the peanut tray and get sprinkled with a little sea salt.

I thought I’d be real clever and freeze the bites of banana, which – in my head – would help the melty chocolate set up, the whole process would be faster, and I’d be a genius.

I know, right?  Well…

What REALLY happened was that while I worked,  the little banana bites started to thaw.  Ever seen condensation on a banana?  They’re slippery!  This is problematic for A) picking them up, and 2) coating them with melty chocolate.

I managed to get several of them done before it really turned into a mess, but one of the things causing me trouble was the chocolate itself.  I double-boilered it with a pot and a mixing bowl, but after a little bit, the chocolate started to solidify a little.  So now I had slippery bananas and chocolate with the consistency of wet concrete.

Then, as it turned out, the frozenness really did help the chocolate set quickly, so I had to kind of jam the sea salt into the tops of them when I had my hands free from the critical dunking stage.

Part 2 of the banana failure: letting them thaw after they were coated.  The bananas turn to liquid and the little bites explode in your mouth.  And not in a good way.  Liquid banana is unsettling.

Clearly, I need practice at coating things in chocolate.  It’s now at the top of my to-do list.

Failure #2 – Mexican spaghetti squash.  Despite all the very clear warnings and historical evidence against it, I thought I’d go ahead and mess with success.  Spaghetti squash MUST just be a vehicle for flavor, so why not top it with salsa, cheddar, and some avocado?  I’ll tell you why not.  Because it’s gross.  Avocado does not go with warm things.  Cheddar is weird when it’s cold.  And salsa is not spaghetti sauce, which is what your mouth WANTS when it eats spaghetti squash.

Don’t worry, I still ate it all.

Related Posts Plugin for WordPress, Blogger...

2 Responses to “#KitchenFail”


  1. Fatal error: Uncaught Error: Call to undefined function ereg() in /home/themal8/public_html/wp-content/themes/bueno/includes/theme-comments.php:66 Stack trace: #0 /home/themal8/public_html/wp-content/themes/bueno/includes/theme-comments.php(20): the_commenter_link() #1 /home/themal8/public_html/wp-includes/comment-template.php(1801): custom_comment(Object(stdClass), Array, 1) #2 /home/themal8/public_html/wp-includes/class-wp-walker.php(202): Walker_Comment->start_el('', Object(stdClass), 1, Array) #3 /home/themal8/public_html/wp-includes/comment-template.php(1768): Walker->display_element(Object(stdClass), Array, '5', 0, Array, '') #4 /home/themal8/public_html/wp-includes/class-wp-walker.php(428): Walker_Comment->display_element(Object(stdClass), Array, '5', 0, Array, '') #5 /home/themal8/public_html/wp-includes/comment-template.php(2117): Walker->paged_walk(Array, '5', 0, 0, Array) #6 /home/themal8/public_html/wp-content/themes/bueno/comments.php(23): wp_list_comments('avatar_size=48&...') #7 /home/themal8/public_html/wp in /home/themal8/public_html/wp-content/themes/bueno/includes/theme-comments.php on line 66