The Maladroit Wife

My husband and I are just like Danny and Sandy, except I’m the dark, mysterious one and he’s the blond with the legs.  Other than that, though, it’s the same.  Very little conversation, only singing and dancing. But really, I’m pretty into grease right now.  Not ONLY does it make bad food taste good, it […]

I haven’t failed yet.  I finished the first week of training in – get this – a week. I even got two compliments on these hilarious shoes today!  One from a cool girl on a bike who was wearing the right clothes (butnottryingtoohard) and one from a little old lady whose day was CLEARLY made […]

I’ve been diagnosed by a Real Doctor as a big fat wimp.  Sissypants.  Merriam Webster says here that a variant of sissypants is sissybritches.  I like that one. The word she threw at me was “vasovagal.”  I googled it.  The Mayo Clinic defines it like this: “Vasovagal syncope (vay-zo-VAY-gul SING-cuh-pee) is the most common cause […]

Only I have brown hair.  And nothing is ever quiiiiite right.  And sometimes that’s how I eat my porridge. That avocado pasta I made the other night?  NOT a fan of the shrimp!  I got some good quality “salad shrimp” from one of the high end stores here.  They weren’t the teeny tiny ones I […]

Am I really the only one who feels totally overcaffeinated when the IKEA catalog shows up in July?  How about Restoration Hardware?  Or even just little ol’ Crate & Barrel?  I find it hard to believe that I’m alone here.  When he asks why I bother dog-earing the pages, I tell him that I’m just […]

I’ve turned to a life of crime. It’s Day Four of my Week of Selfishness.  Fun in the kitchen on Day One, some quiet writing time (and a super fun meeting) on Day Two, and a lovely brunch on Day Three.  Today’s mission?  Pot some herbs.  I had no way of knowing it would take […]