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The Maladroit Wife | Adventures in Domesticity

How the Other Half Lives

1 Aug

BettyBoopTheCleaningLady

[Photo: photobucket khunPaulsak] I know a girl who has a cleaning lady. A CLEANING LADY. Think about that. Now, here’s the part where I say I don’t actually want a cleaning lady.  I mean, they only clean.  They don’t organize or straighten or sort or any of those other things.  I don’t sit on the couch, staring […]

We’re Like Family

16 Jul

I mustache you a question… [Photo: barnorama.com] One of the things I always told clients I like about the large company I (sort of technically don’t) work for is that our meetings always feel like a big family reunion.  In a big room, you might not know everyone, but you know someone who brought them […]

How It’s Done (If You’re Me)

12 Jul

TSA man

This is not the kind of thing I’d normally write about, but several people have asked me how things, like, go when you fly alone with an infant.  I’m approaching level 398 in the Candy Crush Saga of infant travel, so I’m pretty good (I have no idea, I just googled how many levels there are […]

Back to School

11 Jul

mommies

I signed up for a local early childhood and family ed program today.  I’ve had one experience, so far, with meeting some “other mommies.”  There was crafting.  It made me want to stick a pair of pliers into my left eye.  And then the right one. Their outfits were not this cute. So I have […]

How To Screw Up Mac & Cheese

9 Jul

vegetable medley

I eat a lot of Annie’s Mac & Cheese.  It comes in lots of flavors…  yellow, white, tuna, Mexican…  Most days, I like the white one.  It has the strongest cheezy flavor, and it’s All Natural.  I’m completely obsessed with nutrition lately – much to the teethgrinding of my husband, who prefers pizza to all […]

A Week in the Life

25 Jun

ironing

I saw on the news today (the Today show is totally news, particularly when compared to my other information sources, TMZ and Facebook) that a new poll says 70% of people surveyed hate their job.  Good grief, really??  I have a theory that these people haven’t really thought about whether they hate their job, but […]

Happy National Running Day!

6 Jun

runlake

Well, it was yesterday.  But still!  How did you celebrate? Did you run around a lake? Cut your hair. Did you eat clean all day? Spicy quinoa salad?  Yes please! Did you do some yoga, for balance? Ooooommmmmmm…..ggggggg ouch. I celebrated National Running Day by eating donuts.  2 of them.  And Oreos. Run, donuts.  I’m […]

Oh Hi

24 May

all you can eat

So, I’ve been busy.  I mean, not THAT busy, but busy enough that I forget how to do dishes and not burn dinner and sit down and write things. But now I’m back.  To sum up: We went on a family vacation.  A cruise, in fact!  That was a big first for me, on all […]

My Strange Addiction

4 Apr

kicks

I eat highlighters. Okay, I don’t eat highlighters.  And I can’t even watch that show, it gives me the willies. But my snappy new running outfit for vacation next week?  Looks like I ate 3 boxes of highlighters and puked them all over myself. Hot. The argument to my husband was that I needed some clothes […]

I Have A Disability

3 Apr

facepalm

Everything is a disability these days, amirite? I get it, life is hard.  I have volunteered with the Special Olympics, and those are some amazing folks.  But all the disabilities?  It’s like saying everyone is unique.  Or everyone is a winner.  At a certain point, we are ALL disabled and it all sort of loses its […]

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